Budget tips

How to waste money on food

Arrange to meet a friend at a cafe for a late lunch, preferably a fancy cafe that charges a lot so you can more for the same food.

Buy junk food

Skip breakfast so you feel hungry later in the morning. Duck into the convenience store to grab some junk food to deal with the hunger. That should cost a lot more than breakfast. You should never eat regular meals to make sure you are hungry when you go past the convenience store. The convenience store is a great place to waste money on junk food.

Wasting expensive food at the cafe

When you get to cafe make sure you leave a lot of food on the plate. The more you leave the sooner you will be hungry again. Wasting food is a really good way to waste money. Order a dessert, preferably an expensive one. Don’t eat all of the dessert either. You’re not finished with wasting food and money yet. Order a cute cupcake so you take a photo and post that on social media and tell everyone you out at a trendy cafe with friends.

Just ignore your friend while you’re doing that. Posting pictures on social media to show strangers you have a perfect life is way more important than talking to actual friends. Anxiously check the phone every two minutes for comments or likes.

You should have a really expensive smart phone with camera, internet access and all the bells and whistles. It doesn’t matter if you actually need all those features. You should have them anyway to make sure you pay a lot every month to the phone company. The expense will help stress you out.

Comfort food

You been spending a fair bit and that expensive lunch pushed you closer to spending your whole pay cheque before payday. Now you get anxious and start stressing out about money. You need a bit of comfort when you’re stressed. Go to the bakery and buy a nice cream bun to feel better. Spending money when you’re stressed about spending money is a really good way to get even more stressed. You might need to buy more comfort food before payday.

Eating at home

When you have your evening meal be sure to throw part of it in the bin. You need to be imaginative about waste. Open a tin of beetroot, preferably a big one, and use a couple of slices. Put the tin in the fridge. After a couple of days you can throw it out because it is a health hazard leaving food in open tins.

Food storage containers

Never use these because they make food stay fresh longer and they means you waste less food and money.

Check the expiry date

Buy cheap meat just before the expiry date so you should cook and eat it the same day. Take the meat home and put it in the fridge. Go out for fast food instead of cooking the meat. Next day the meat will be past the expiry date. Throw it away.

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